As I sit and read my news feed on Facebook, I notice certain people are always going through some Greek tragedy or another. That made me wonder if they are playing a very sad version of Tag, You are It. This is why I ask you today, are you IT?
Let’s face it, life is not so much what happens to us. It is what we make of what happens to us that matters and colors our existence. I am not saying that some people are looking for bad things to happen to them. I understand that some of us have more sobering experiences than others. What I am saying is that how you work through those experiences is what makes you a victim or a victor.
I have a friend that is always going through something. First, he fell of his motorcycle. Later on, he hurt his hand pretty bad. After that, he had a heart situation. All of this happened in 2012 and the year is not over. The funny thing is that when he comments on Facebook, you never hear the good stuff in his life, it is always the bad stuff. I have another friend whose had a bad patch of luck also. If he is not in the hospital, one of his kids is. And yet, this guy still finds the time to make really funny comments and posts to brighten everybody’s day, including himself. And that is the key. Both these men are going through similar experiences. Their health is suffering and thanks to Facebook, we know about it. Yet one of them chooses to go through it and have a sense of humor, the other one is always in victim mode.
So why am I telling you all this? Choose your experience and be careful of the payoff. Very often the payoff for victims is the feeling of “everybody cares about me”. If you need external validation, you are in trouble. And by the way, it is ok to share that things are not always great. If that is all we hear from you, it is unattractive and we get tired of it.
Today, as the first friend is battling a real emergency, people are beginning to leave sarcastic comments on his wall, because they are tired of the whining. If you are going to expose yourself and your drama to the world, keep two things in mind:
1) if you only show one side of you, the drama, eventually people are going to tune you off
2) once you expose yourself in this way, be ready for the comments, good and bad, that will come your way.
Be a good Diva. AviddivA, for the Diva in All of Us.