Day 207: Motivate Yourself To

It is an interesting thing, life.  Every once in a while, you find yourself in some sort of rut.  Every week feels the same, every day has a different connotation.  For me, it has become Fridays.  They feel odd.  They are the hardest days of the week for me.  It is in days like this that you need to motivate yourself to do whatever it is that you are doing.

Let’s face it:  some of us love our jobs, some of us like our jobs and some of us just know that the job is a means to an end.  There are those who are happy to go to work every day and some that are not.  It is however, the one place where you spend most of your waking hours and you should at least enjoy the experience.

I will tell you a little secret:  even those who love their jobs have days when they don’t want to work.  In those days, they use a little secret to motivate themselves to do what must be done.  Today I share what my strategy is.

The way you motivate yourself to do anything in life, is by reminding yourself why you are doing something in the first place.  For me, it means going into my journal and making a couple of lists.  The first list is the gratitude list.  If you start the day on a positive note, reminding yourself of the good things in your life, you are probably going to change your outlook and notice more of the things that you love.

The second list I make is of the things I would like to achieve in life.  I am not talking only about the important things, like having a good family, happy marriage, love and health.  I am talking about the silly things like wanting to scuba dive and surfing for the first time.  It is my motivation.  The silly things make the big ones even better.  And let’s face it, on the days that you don’t want to get out of bed, that trip you want to make to Australia sounds like a big reason to get to work.

So the next time you don’t feel like going anywhere or doing anything productive, take out your notebook and make a list that motivates you to conquer.  And if you have another way to get yourself psyched up to do something, leave us your suggestion below.  Thanks.

Day 203: Am I too Old?

The other day I made the statement that as I sat here sad that I was no longer 37, the though hit me that I did not want to be 57 one day and crying because I was no longer 47.  The thought woke me up from my own depression.  Life is not over because you are 47 or any other age for that matter.  Then I started wondering if maybe I am too old.

Here is the thing.  Age is just a number.  We use it to figure out how long has it been since we were born.  The truth is, if we lived by a different calendar, we would have a different age.  Think about it.  If the human calendar went by 16 months instead of 12, I would be about to turn 36.  If, on the other hand, the calendar was six months long, I would be almost 92.  The sooner we stop looking as our so-called age as anything more than just a number, the better off we will be.

Another thing I don’t care much for is the term middle-aged.  What does that even mean?  If I make it to 100, middle age does not even start for another three years.  If I only live until I am 60, middle age happened a long time ago.  This should be the time of your life when you start figuring out that others opinions about you is none of your business, when having a life means more than having a job.  The kids are now old enough that you don’t have to hover as much and you can go back to having your own life.  This is a wonderful time.  Enjoy it.

Some days, I wake up knowing that I am older.  The back may hurt, if you slept wrong your neck might give you a hard time and you might have to go to a doctor to get your eyesight checked or your blood examined.  So what?  I know plenty of people with cancer, diabetes and all kinds of dangerous conditions that live life to the fullest each day.  Some of them should not even be here anymore but the thing is, they don’t let any one thing determine how their life will go.  They are hopeful, they are positive and they see the glass as half full.  They go for it and so should you.

Am I too old?  Only if I believe it.  The same is true for you.  You could be twenty and think your life is over or you could be 80 and believe you are just getting started.  What are you thinking?  Leave your comment below.  Thank you.

Day 198: Revenge is Stupid…Unless

The other day I was watching American Greed…yes, again. I came across an episode about the aftermath of the Madoff scandal. I could not get over the victims. It is not that I don’t believe they were wronged. The more I learn about what he was doing, the more I know many of the victims had no clue what he was doing. It is the poison that they have allowed in their lives as a consequence. They are upset that he is upset because his victims have no way to pay the rent. They don’t like the fact that the man is admired by the other prisoners. It goes on and on. At one point one woman says it is not about Madoff anymore. I guess some victims got together and wrote a book to warn other investors. And yet, as she is saying that it is not about him anymore, you can see that she hates the man. Here’s the thing. So long as they hold on to the hate, they are letting Madoff define their lives.

Revenge for them did not end by sending him to jail and writing a book. These people will forever be marked by this. What a waste of time and people. I have always believed that if you spend your entire life hating somebody, they win twice. They beat you by hurting you and they beat you a second time by becoming your obsession. In this case revenge is stupid. There will never be a good enough revenge for people who hurt like this.

The only way revenge is good is when it is about you and not about your abuser. What do I mean by this? I was repeatedly bullied when I was young. I don’t remember most of their names. I definitely don’t remember what they look like. That is the point. To me, revenge is making a good life for myself and proving one more time that they were right in being jealous of me. Because I have it all. I am not a millionaire yet, and I am working towards it. I don’t have a fancy car or a big house. I have a roof over my head with all the books I love and more to come. I am smart, talented and not a bad looker. I have a wonderful family. I live in a nice place. The truth is, I have everything I could possibly want and more. I can tell you that for what I’ve seen, some of my bullies did not fare so well. That usually happens when your entire life is based on hurting people without healing yourself.

This, my dear, IS the best REVENGE. If you are hurting now, if somebody bullies you relentlessly, know that they will run out of stupid things to say eventually. Their brain is not good enough to come up with anything original. You, however, have talent, intelligence and something they want. Don’t give in to their craziness. Keep going your own way and watch the magic happen.